What Women Want (and other Goodies)

 Passing on some messages, stories and other resources that I’ve been listening to…enjoy!

 “The Marriage” Message (which I subtitle “What Women Want”) by Matt Carter for Acts 29 Network (a resource for church planters founded by Mark Driscoll): Male or female,  my “What Women Want” title probably caught your attention (and perhaps reminded you of that Helen Hunt and Mel Gibson movie of the same title which I saw bits of years ago and do not remember, other than to note that I don’t  recall it actually being about what women want). As I listened to “The Marriage” message, which, from what I gather, was preached to an audience of pastors and their wives, for probably the first time I felt that this was an articulation of what women who love Jesus (and, to some extent, women who aren’t followers of Christ) actually want. 

Whenever there's talk of what women want – including in biblical sermons about romantic relationships–  almost inevitably I end up rolling my eyes over the practical tips given to men for giving women “what they want” because something is usually said as an absolute that does not represent what I actually want. My favorite example: the advice that telling a woman she’s beautiful  - and offering other compliments – is an essential for making her feel special. I’m not saying I don’t ever want to be told I’m beautiful or be otherwise complimented, but offering compliments would not make a top five list of things I need to feel valued by a man in a romantic relationship (as I’ve blogged before, I am a "show me" rather than a "tell me" kind of girl; I’m cool with whatever compliments when they’re anchored by actions!). 

Anyway, my mini diatribe highlights what I think this message gets right: first, it articulates the biblical calling of a man in marriage (and can be applied to Christ-centered dating relationships) - but then gives practical tips for men loving their women in the ways they accept love. Men, it hits home that showing love to a woman is not about working around the fact that women are “complicated” or dealing with us hailing “from Venus” while you are “from Mars,” but about studying and understanding the particular woman God gives you.  I think that’s a lot easier than trying to figure out what women collectively want, in the abstract– and will certainly get you better results! And I see this message as the closest thing to a tailored “how to love a woman” that I’ve ever heard. Most importantly, the message reinforces that, in any godly marriage, she must be loved as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.

Ladies, I also think it’s a good message to evaluate potential mates and, married or single, pray for men.

I won’t say any more because you just have to hear this message! A couple of housekeeping items for when you listen: (1) Question: Ladies, am I the only one who never read or watched Twilight? I feel like there’s a lot of us who didn’t for various reasons, but I get – and appreciate – where he’s going, lol. And (2) there is a passing reference to The Drudge Report. I do not support The Drudge Report, and note, it is a passing reference (whew!).

Anyway, I pray the message speaks to you, male or female – our world needs it! Click here to download the message, or get the podcast on iTunes: Acts 29 Network Sermons > select “Podcasts”  (rather than “All”)> “The Marriage”, March 29, 2012. 

Jordan & Jessica Video  (click  here to listen, from Essence.Com):  Speaking of love, this true story is a wonderful example of God’s power and plans for His children. It’s about a couple, Jessica and Jordan, who were both widowed in their 20s and how God orchestrated their love story. In explaining their story, Jessica referenced Ephesians 3:20, which I will quote along with verse 21:  “²⁰ Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, ²¹ to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Amen! Be encouraged by this story – and pass it on!

Do North: My pastor has been preaching an eight-week sermon series on the seven letters to the churches in Revelation 2 & 3 about the importance of re-focusing The Church, The Body of Christ – on Christ. He’s done an excellent job providing historical context for each of the churches and very relevant, practical manifestations of both the grievances and the praise Jesus expressed, and how it relates to the church at present. He also addresses how the letters may apply to your personal walk with God. He then provides ways for turning our focus northward. We just had the Week 5 message and have three weeks to go. The whole series is worth listening to – weeks four and five especially (as I type, the Week 5 message is not up yet, but it will be soon). You can find Do North messages here.

 National Christian Writers Conference:  A few months ago I attended a Christian Writers’ conference in California that is coming to D.C. in October! It's a great resource for writing workshops, marketing and publishing tips. There also is a Gospel Music Expo track that provides similar resources for artists. Currently, early bird registration is $125, and you can register here. Additionally, for the conference NCWC is accepting proposals for classes and workshops on publishing books in the Christian market.You can find more information here.